|
Post by elementallycharmed on Jun 22, 2016 15:22:57 GMT
So, sometimes I find myself needing to just vent, I usually feel better after just being ridiculous and getting it out of my system. Also, being so close to a situation can make it hard to see the bigger picture, I think expressing yourself and having a chance to come back to it is not only helpful, but cathartic. I just wanted to say this is a safe space to be petty, and angry, and received with no judgement.
|
|
sykax
Junior Member
Posts: 60
|
Post by sykax on Jun 22, 2016 22:46:35 GMT
I just NEED to vent about my roommates. I get that we all have jobs, but the fact remains that we ALL need to pitch in around the house. The moment I walked through the door I had to do the dishes (my turn), break down boxes, clean the ferret cage, take out the trash (my turn), empty the diaper genie (we have one for our dog bags, also my turn), sweep, and now finally make dinner. We're supposed to have a rule that when you take the last soda out of the box you break it down, or if you order pizza break down the box, and the basic who did what last thing. But they NEVER follow those rules! Last night one roommate asked if I was going to change the ferret litter, it wasn't my turn and I voiced that; his response"I didn't think that was something we took turns out, I thought it just happened." Like seriously?!? It's your fucking ferret, mine literally just died recently. I'm so tired of having to do the majority of the work around here. And one roommate literally does nothing! He claims it's because of his anxiety (don't get me wrong I understand that its a serious mental disease(I have social anxiety in massive groups of people)) but at some point you need to face it and fight it. I'm just so frustrated right now. I love them both to death, but I'm over this bullshit.
|
|
|
Post by Kayla Maria on Jun 23, 2016 0:04:23 GMT
Stand up for yourself! Make a chores chart and get everyone to sit down and agree to it--oooh, make them SIGN. If they argue it isn't needed, tell them THEY don't think so because you've been doing a lot of work, and it would make you feel better if you just tried it out for a week.
Other than in the case of the ferret, who needs to be taken care of--let the rest of it rot. Pinch your nose and hold your ground. Don't be the good guy and clean up. Let the piles get higher and see how they notice.
I had roommates who did gross things in the bathroom so those were what I did -shrugs-
|
|
|
Post by elementallycharmed on Jun 23, 2016 1:12:33 GMT
I'm sorry to say I'm a pretty terrible cleaner myself. I've been spoiled my whole life and my bf does too. I think an agreement would be a good idea, and then the reminders on their day so they don't skip.
|
|
|
Post by elementallycharmed on Jun 23, 2016 18:23:02 GMT
So, I woke up this morning to a facebook friend's (who I haven't seen in close to 8 years) wife sending me a message. I had to respond because seriously, WTF? But here is my thing...how bored to you have to be to see who liked something from 2008? And isn't that the point of Facebook? To stay in touch and see what people are up to. **Please note that as her husband had made a couple of inappropriate comments via messenger, they were not welcomed, asked for, or received well.** I don't usually talk down to people, or judge them for their past or life choices....BUT when I wake up to crazy shit first thing PRE-COFFEE....then you're asking for it. Especially when I don't know you, and have never met you.
|
|
Aeris
New Member
Posts: 45
|
Post by Aeris on Jun 23, 2016 19:54:06 GMT
So, I woke up this morning to a facebook friend's (who I haven't seen in close to 8 years) wife sending me a message. I had to respond because seriously, WTF? But here is my thing...how bored to you have to be to see who liked something from 2008? And isn't that the point of Facebook? To stay in touch and see what people are up to. **Please note that as her husband had made a couple of inappropriate comments via messenger, they were not welcomed, asked for, or received well.** I don't usually talk down to people, or judge them for their past or life choices....BUT when I wake up to crazy shit first thing PRE-COFFEE....then you're asking for it. Especially when I don't know you, and have never met you. Drag her Jessica!! I can tell you hate drama but tbh I would screenshot the inappropriate messages her husband sent you and then send them to her and ruin her day
|
|
|
Post by elementallycharmed on Jun 23, 2016 20:59:57 GMT
She had probably hacked his fb and saw them anyways. Sadly this happened not too long ago with another girl...ironically named Kassandra. Which now has me even angrier! I AM NOT A HOME WRECKER (anymore - I did go through a phase 17-19) like I am a successful and busy woman. I'm happy! Happy people don't chase other peoples S.O. or BFs. They just don't. But now I feel compelled to post from the other girl, who I did send screen shots too. :/ Thanks for letting me be petty!
|
|
|
Post by elementallycharmed on Jun 23, 2016 21:16:15 GMT
|
|
|
Post by elementallycharmed on Jun 23, 2016 21:21:38 GMT
AGAIN!! I would like to clarify that I do not try and steal anyones man! I am friends with people so we talk, and yes some of my friends and I are really close, plus this is Texas, I call just about everyone babe or hun. It's just part of the vernacular here. There is also apparently issues that she's had in the past with me. Idk, man I try to be a good friend and listen and give suggestions when I'm asked but I swear lately these crazies are all coming out of the wood work!
|
|
|
Post by elementallycharmed on Jun 23, 2016 21:22:32 GMT
So, I woke up this morning to a facebook friend's (who I haven't seen in close to 8 years) wife sending me a message. I had to respond because seriously, WTF? But here is my thing...how bored to you have to be to see who liked something from 2008? And isn't that the point of Facebook? To stay in touch and see what people are up to. **Please note that as her husband had made a couple of inappropriate comments via messenger, they were not welcomed, asked for, or received well.** I don't usually talk down to people, or judge them for their past or life choices....BUT when I wake up to crazy shit first thing PRE-COFFEE....then you're asking for it. Especially when I don't know you, and have never met you. Drag her Jessica!! I can tell you hate drama but tbh I would screenshot the inappropriate messages her husband sent you and then send them to her and ruin her day Seriously, if you have this much time on your hands, why not use it for something constructive, like working on your relationship or bettering yourself, or I mean...working on your grammar! And honestly, no I really do not do drama. Not from friends, strangers, or even family. I am a firm believer that you either create drama, invite drama, or associate with people who do. I have no time for all that.
|
|
sykax
Junior Member
Posts: 60
|
Post by sykax on Jun 23, 2016 23:01:41 GMT
Stand up for yourself! Make a chores chart and get everyone to sit down and agree to it--oooh, make them SIGN. If they argue it isn't needed, tell them THEY don't think so because you've been doing a lot of work, and it would make you feel better if you just tried it out for a week. Other than in the case of the ferret, who needs to be taken care of--let the rest of it rot. Pinch your nose and hold your ground. Don't be the good guy and clean up. Let the piles get higher and see how they notice. I had roommates who did gross things in the bathroom so those were what I did -shrugs- I'm just not good with that type of confrontation. Like every time I try to talk to them about issues with the place, they gang up on me.
|
|
|
Post by Kayla Maria on Jun 23, 2016 23:55:30 GMT
Damn Jess. Destined to leave a trail of broken hearts behind you x] I feel kinda bad for her, though. Like to be that insecure? And also that usually comes with a bad relationship, so TC ain't looking so clean to me either. That just sounds like everyone's having a bad time. Yikes.
She's totally out of line going crazy at you about it though. Like... tell your man to stay in his lane, don't follow him into someone elses. Esp since there is nothing between you two. I never understand why partners who's SOs have wandering eyes blame the other person like friend...buddy... Let's all take heed of the wise words of Beyoncé Giselle Knowles-Carter and Shakira Isabel Mebarak Ripoll... "Let's not kill the karma, let's not start a fight, it's not worth the drama for a beautiful liar." (rad song about two ladies ganging up on a double-crossing lover. the music video is hipalicious. ahem. anyway)
And Syka... Hmm. Plan A, if you have a mutual friend, ask them to play mediator with a conversation? Plan B, Just stop cleaning anything that isn't in your immediate space. Your room? Immaculate. The dishes you eat off of? Perfect. Everyone else's shit? Too bad so sad
|
|
|
Post by elementallycharmed on Jun 24, 2016 2:46:47 GMT
Kayla, you sound like a genius sage. Your suggestion to Skya is spot on and perfect. I heartily second it!
|
|
Aeris
New Member
Posts: 45
|
Post by Aeris on Jun 24, 2016 20:52:42 GMT
Apologies if this turns into a fairly long post but I can't hold my frustration in:
So I love my best friend, don't get me wrong. I don't know what I would do without him. And I get that we're millennials and just beginning our twenties, so we're on our phones a lot, it's natural; we grew up with technology. But I also see a limit in how much fucking time someone can spend on their phone.
Like I said, I love my best friend, but he gets on my fucking nerves. I moved from Fairfield to San Francisco almost two years ago (Fairfield is about an hour from SF) and I love it when he finally comes to visit me in the city. But 99.9% of the time, he spends on his fucking. goddamn. phone. And I'm not sure why, but I find it SO. FUCKING. IRRITATING. I spend time on my phone and I have a horrible attention span, but I also know how to appreciate the present before it becomes the past rather than spending my whole life on my phone. I can bring him out to a park or a party and where will he be? In the corner sitting on his phone (which, given large situations, I can understand because we both used to struggle with social anxiety and he still does in minor ways) but even if he's chilling in the living room with me (or even hanging out with me at my parent's house when I visit home!!) he'll be on his fucking phone on twitter or tumblr or snapchat, or just texting other people.
I'm fine with people being on their phone when it's a quiet moment or there are a few minutes of nothing going on so you whip out your phone. But we'll do things such as agreeing to watch a movie and I'm surprised I can go an entire movie without looking at my phone even once, but him? Nah, you can find him either snapchatting the goddamn movie or checking his phone for some sort of notification at least once every few minutes and it INFURIATES ME. Don't come to San Francisco to visit me then spend 90% of the time on your fucking phone, away from reality.
I've even confronted him about it several times but he either snaps back saying "Get off my back/you're getting on my nerves about always being on my phone!" or doesn't take me seriously at all. I can't take it anymore and I actually start to get pissed off when he comes to visit me because I know, I just KNOW, he's gonna spend an abnormally large amount of time on his phone.
He and my other best friend are coming tonight and spending tonight and tomorrow night over at my house in SF before we go to the SF Pride Parade, but I just can't stand him being on his phone. I'm not asking for anyone to curse or hex him or his phone or whatever. But do you have any magick/magick ideas I could do to at least somehow help him not be on it either at all or WAY less while he's here? I've been having such a good week and don't want this petty ordeal to ruin my weekend.
Quick (but meaningful/helpful) responses would be much appreciated because he'll be here in a couple hours and I have no idea what to do.
|
|
|
Post by elementallycharmed on Jun 24, 2016 21:14:44 GMT
So I actually have this exact same problem with my sister. Except she has a daughter to tend to when we visit...so a lot of the time she's not paying attention to anything other than her phone. It drives me nuts, because like you...I live over an hour away and I don't see her often. For a laugh (and maybe for real?) www.karenmichalson.com/a-spell-to-attract-attention/**That was kind of a joke** But maybe a spell, (I was thinking for attention, but that could go wrong quickly) so what about a spell to be heard? I found this one online. "I'm all ears Ingredients Mind Voice Group of friends(if they are in the same room as you) Description This is a spell for those friends or people who just won't listen. Spell Casting While thinking of your friends or a group of people, or while in the same room as them chant: For the (person/ people) who (listen/listens)but never (hear/hears) Make them see how it feels to be all ears" www.spellsofmagic.com/print_spell.htm?spell_id=8685Maybe add some of your own flair? An Orange candle for self expression? Or Black for banishing negativity? Maybe throw some herbs in for Irritability? Like Lavender, St. John's Wort, or Valerian? Or if you have a picture of you two, maybe cut it in half, and then bind it back together using white string, "What once was whole is now in pieces, bring back together what is needed. A friend free of distraction and hindrance, what is in pieces make completed." - (Sorry I just came up with that off the top of my head)
|
|